im starting to love tis song.
listen to it carefully bah.
got jj's voice inside. hahas.
kind of meaningful.
笨蛋
冰箱结霜咖啡滚烫
煮不好最简单的早餐
我的生活是一团混乱
维持单身感觉茫然
喜不喜欢习不习惯
我总是说不出个答案
一个人来又一个人往
怎么让他流连忘返
我不想当笨蛋
我在墙上写满渴望
我可以大哭一场
房间还是空空荡荡
我绝对不逞强
该属于我任其自然
可是我也要安全感
在某个适当程度的主张
纵然是了解眼光也是温暖
每个早上都想赖床
没有梦是最让人沮丧
我的眼睛盯着天花板
也跑不出任何对象
我不想当笨蛋
我在墙上写满渴望
我可以大哭一场
房间还是空空荡荡
我绝对不逞强
该属于我任其自然
可是我也要安全感
在某个适当程度的主张
纵然是了解眼光也是温暖
sing sing sing. at home sing alot. in sch jiu cannot le.
bet wib sherr. i wont sing in sch.
well i must do it.
so i can hear her sing.
hahahs.
todae. lots of ppl tempting me to open my mouth and sing nor.
huh. tempt me somemore.
later cannot hear sherr sing arh.
hahas. baddy. baddy.
tml no sch.
stay at home can sing all i want. hahahas.
i wanna sing tis song in ktv next time.
dun stop me.
hahas. =xx
im rotting here. no body online nor. tml how?
sherr want audi.
but den. i might miss alot. jus like todae.
hahas.
i feel like crying again damit.
theEnd;DD
4/30/2007 08:40:00 PM
im very very hot now.
hab a real fast trip to rm.
imagine. frm my house walk real fast to rm
and frm rm back home.
hot hot hot.
need fan.
hmm.
came home dl dl songs.
den went in audi wib sherr.
since my bro not back yet.
so can use his keyboard.
play play play. he came back!!
took away the keyboard.
causing my to keep missing and missing and missing.
my god.
i seriously cant audi wib my laptop.
make till me dam pekcek.
den no heart to play liao.
i was dam quiet jus now.
hmmm.
todae she made me dam pekcek de.
i jus wanna shout at her.
dam.
hahas.
hmm.
she wanna borrow bernice's work and copy.
den all bushuang her ma.
noe wat i did?
i walked passed her. pretending dat someone is behind.
and i said tis out loudly.
'you noe? its not right to copy people's work.'
hahas.you all should noe the meaning.
ahahas.
noe wat?
she told bernice sae we neglect her.
she was neglect by both groups she's in.
wa lau.
complain lah
go go go complain more.
we dun giv a dam to you.
*im jus bad forgive me you left me wib no choice*
after sch. ezlink card no money le.
when to find mummy to top up.
den we went for our weekly lunch outing liao.
but tis week. tlt was not around wib us.
lols.
she went home.
hahas.
we tried the cheesy melt.
seriously.
its not nice.
realli not nice.
i dun like the taste.
hahas.
tlt was so high todae in sch.
everyone also.
suddenly tot of tis you noe?
i haben had my dinner todae.
although im hungry.
but i dun feel like eating..
how?
mummy come back sure scold de.
well i shall eat my dinner later on.
hahas.
my hair is getting long.
wanna go had a hair cut le.
well. will get scolding frm mummy again~
i'll always scolding whenever i saes i want to cut hair.
hmmm.
or shall i leave it long?
hahas.
depends.
see my mood bah.
lalalas.
wat else?
going to have PE on wed.
think it should be 5 items.
and guess wat?
the next day its my birthday.
im soo heng.
still consider as 15
if not tis week take 5 items.
den too bad le.
i'm 16 den.
aarrgg.
hahas.
lets countdown!! 3 more days hahas.
''can someone please teach me how to control my emotions?
im going to have another breakdown soon.''
theEnd;DD
4/30/2007 08:01:00 PM
im rotting here.
dam fedup wib dat person.
added me in msn.
and started scolding me.
wtf.
she claims to be ellen's sis.
wth.
so different frm ellen nor.
idiot.
she said one thing.
den i now wats happening.
thurs.
ellen at msn
gave me a link frm friendster.
den call me to report the person.
so i think its ok to help her lah.
ellen sound like very fedup wib this person.
so helped her nor.
den jus now dat person.
add me ma.
i dunno who she is.
so ask 'who are you?'
didnt expect thaat she started scolding me.
i think she still small.
den started scolding me
'FUCK'
'CHEE BYE'
in capslock somemore.
stupiid shee.
aarrrgg.
kana block by me liao.
cannot stand tis type of ppl toking to me.
wib this type of sucky attitude.
i was jus helping ellen.
i tot it was no harm.
but didnt expect that i will kana scolding lor.
spoilt my mood.
dun let me see her sia.
theEnd;DD
4/29/2007 08:38:00 PM
oh god. i been sneezing non stop back home.
damm.
i was like crying like dat.
reali non stop.
omg. someone pls stop me frm sneezing.
im feeling dat im gonna fall sick.
real real soon.
well. wat a wonderful day we spend todae.
hahas. nice nice.
they bought me to k box.
ahahahas.
a place which i wanna go soo much.
but i didnt sing enough.
although i sang throughout the whole 3hr session.
but i think its not enough.
we onli got high at the last few songs nor.
esp the song get high we got so so so high.
hahas. fun fun.
den dar was like asking me.
ever thought of joining the punggol superstar tis year not?
hmm. got kinda of afraid of it le bah.
last year did so badly.
cos of her. everyone saes is her fault.
hmm. nvm lah.
tis year not much confidence. hahas.
plus dun even noe whether i reali did sing well not.
but i still love singing.
hahas
dat ernest arh. keep taking pictures. but not sing.
i was the one singing. except for few songs.
i didnt sing.
sang 我怀念的.
the music was like dam dam soft de.
i was at there 清唱. hahas.
we realise dat.
go ktv must sing those fast fast songs.
a few slow songs will do.
hahas.
well i didnt sing enough lah.
i want more.
hahas.
they bought a cake for me.
althought its chocolate.
but its still nice.
and and and. they bought me a forever friends de bear bear. wib a crown.
wowww.. dam dam dam cute de.
iloveit.
THANKS GIRLS.
I LOVE YOU ALL REALI REALI MUCH.
hmm.
till half way. junyang became dam dam emo.
didnt wish to see him like tis lei.
want him to be happy.
see him smile oso good.
hmm. was surpose to get out of kbox a 3pm..
but no one came in to like drive us out.
untill its like almost. 3.20-30pm den someone came in and told us
''its time le. sing the last song bah''.
well our song jus started.
and dat song was like real real long de.
so we sae aiya. sing finish the whole song. wahahahas.
but den till half of the song.
we stop. and sang another song.
we simply dun care bout the timing;the person
we jus happy happy continue singing and enjoy ourselves.
hahas.
after dat. we went to take neos.
well its dat infra-red machine.
hahas. we took it wib the boys.
den was like nice. got them into our phone.
nice nice.
hahas. guess who we saw? angel and sheryl.
LOLS.
dam shocking.
angel's eyes was like bigg bigg looking at us.
dam paiseh lah.
didnt expect to see them there.
hmm dun care.
we 6 girls. went to take neo at the other machine.
take hao le den. while tlt they all decorating. me;ber;temp;yi.
stand beside the machine onli.
den suddly dar came in wib angel and sheryl
they came in and tok to us.
angel was like asking us.
how come nv call xin.
den we was like dunno.
she was looking at me.
den i said i dunno anything. the girls planned de.
hahas. dun care lah.
den dar also got ask angel they all ma.
y nv call xin also.
her answer was.
she's out wib her boyfren.
so we call or not call her answer still the same de arh.
she still will go out wib boyfren de.
go out wib her will onli see her attitude.
black black face.
hahas.
after the whole thing. went to meet papa mama at bugis.
they were eating steamboat.
den sat down. ate wib them.
lols piggy sia.
eat. mummy keep putting food into my bowl.
lols. but ended up not eating much lah.
wasted money. ahahs.
i almost bought a necklace. crown de. daddy wanna buy for me.
but dunno why. i reject his offer.
lols.
now think of it. i find myself stupid sia.
the necklace was unique. omg.
hahas. nvm lah.
hahas. i wanna get softtoy for my birthday.
but didnt saw any. mummy dun let me see.
hmmm.
*girls i like the present you all got for me reali reali very much.
thanks for everything todae.
and those tears and laughters we shared.
will always be kept in mind.
thanks so much.
love you all.
loves*
theEnd;DD
4/28/2007 10:15:00 PM
i cant control my emotions anymore.
while listening to all my songs in my song list.
i broke down and cried.
cannot control le.
silly me?
seeing him happy its enough.
i noe he is happy.
reali great.
i will be happy too?
the girls are habing the mock exam right now.
well jiiayou.
hmm.
later need go back sch hab meeting.
wonder. how much will i get for my cca.
how much points.
hmmm. im reali bored rright now.
nth to do.
i must get you out of my mind*
theEnd;DD
4/26/2007 11:33:00 AM
hmm. im slacking at home right now.
while others are in sch studying.
hahas. i overslept todae.
so ended up staying at home do nth.
hahas. no lah. later mummy wants me to pack up my room.
lols. i overslept so do my bro and my father.
father overslept not my business lah.
he got his own alarm to wake him up.
while bro depends on me.
later he wake up will be at there blaming me liao.
always like dat de.
call him ownself wake up dun want.
depend on me.
hmmm.
todae didnt go sch. dunno tml still can go out not lei.
die.
and my voice is dissapearing.
god. im losing my voice.
den. sure kana scolding frm them de lor.
they call me ''preserve'' my voice.
so dat i can sing my own birthday song.
they singin? hmm
i made tlt waited for me dam dam long tis morning.
didnt expect dat im not able to wake up for sch tis morning.
damit. all because of my alarm.
i rmbed i did set my alarm before i went to slp.
and i set it at a correct timing.
and yet. i still can overslept.
omg.
later gonna go back to sch. for a little while.
hmm. die. im feeling giddy again.
wth lah. tis few days was like tis.
hmmm.
theEnd;DD
4/26/2007 09:14:00 AM
back back back. hmmm.
tiring day
hahas.
habb chinese oral exams todae. woooo.
hmmm.
dunno i did well not?
dun think so.
im soo so nervous.
omg.
hmm. den our class de was like so so fast.
so i quite fast jiu finish liao.'
den went waiting for the girls.
dat sherr arh.
went to mdm yap there do maths.
i dun want ma. so i stayed in the canteen waiting for them to come down.
i did smth reali dam stupid.
i was sitting wib yih rue in the canteen.
den i saw herr coming
i got tis feeling dat she will come and tok to me.
so i quickly tell yih rue.
quick quick. we go walk walk
hahas. den i went over to bridget there.
told her.
''jie wo duo yi xia''
hahas
den tok tok tok to them awhile.
saw herr walk off den i walk off.
hahahas.
hmm.
when sherr came down le.
i suddenly got this idea.
we went to play volleyball.
hahas. volly.
and we all went mad.
real mad. all zi high sia.
hmmm.
we played real long. but didnt see tlt coming down
so slow sia.
she was the 2nd last one.
sad sad.
hmmm.
waited for her more den an hour.
den when she's finally out.
the aunty has lock all the gates.
so she was lock up there.
hahs.
lucky mr tan saw us. den called the aunty to open the gate for her.
wa siao sia.
if mr tan wasnt there. i dunno wat will happen
LOLS.
i will go find the aunty de lah.
hahas.
todae im dam dam dam tired.
i almost fall aslp in everylessons.
the lesson i reali slpt was chinese.
luckly i wasnt scolded.
hmm.
tml got another mock exam again.
wth.
girls rmb to bring chinese dictionary!!
hmmm.
ytd i didnt complain bout herr.
dam dam dam lazy le bah.
everyday complaining bout her
you all not siian i dou siian le.
reali cant stand her liao.
and sherr; dar;yi was shocked by me todae.
AGAIN~
lols.
dam. another vulgur words came out frm me again.
god. im getting worst and worst.
all her fault lah.
act nice to us.
no need lah.
stop all your actings.
dar;yi;sherr keep saying dat.
they feeling like giving her one tight slap.
me too.. for todae nia.
dam bitchy.
reali cant stand lah.
own work dunno how to do.
copy copy and copy.
onli noe how to copy.
all yr work oso want us to help you do.
might as well yr o'lvls we also help you take lah.
get on yr own feet lah.
cannot depend on us to help you do everything.
and one thing you must make sure is dat.
we are not on good terms.
hmm. saturday is coming.
oohh. hahas. birthday its jus a week away.
ask yrself did you rmbed?
hahas. my girls are celebrating it wib me on sat
dunno wat they planned sia.
felt so weird.
hmmm. i onli noe dat they are bringing me to marina square.
hahas.
as for my birthday dat day.
im kind of afraid.
afraid dat. wat the other ppl are going to do to me.
so many ppl noe its my birthday nor.
so scary.
esp queenie.
omg. scary. scary.
hahas. mummy hab taken leave on dat day.
who else will be celebrating wib me?
you? you? or you?
hmmm.
hmmm die.
i felt dat im feeling jealous.
jealous of certain things.
shhhh..
hahas.
i asked dar. a very stupid question todae.
'will you feel like crying anytime whn nth happens?'
hmmm. she said ya.
den ask me 'why? dun tell me you feel like crying now'
hahas. i jus replied her a no.
but actually. its a yes.
sorry dar.
dunno lei.
jus feel like crying anytime.
wats going wrong wib me?
theEnd;DD
4/26/2007 04:16:00 AM
ahahahas.
todae its a tired day. so late den online.
hahas.
hmmm. early morning. first period was chinese
tan teck meng wasnt here. AGAIN. hahas.
den we hab to do pass year paper.
hmmm. den the bitches F and W
was busying toking away.
den teacher as us for their names.
no choice we gave her their name.
pardon me for being bad sia.
you left me wib no choice.
den wat? i didnt managed to finish the paper.
well.
nvm lah.
dun care.
next PE!! siian.
got to re-run my 2.4 again.
hmmm.
hab to change to PE attire. so went toilet lor.
den change hao le. went out of the cubical.
saw yi and sherr standing out there lor.
hmm. den we took out our skirt. den i saw herr coming in.
i dun wanna see her ma.
so i went back into the cubical. but didnt close the door lah.
shandy came in.
pushed me inside lock the door.
telling the girls outside dat shes gonna rape me.
LOLS.
hahas. den paiseh lei.
kana pushed in by her.
must wait till she take off her skirt den i can go out.
*shy shy*
hmm. 2.4 was reali torturing for me.
mr tay ran wib me.
making me run.
lols.
untill 3rd round i jiu cannot liao.
feeling very giddy.
might faint anytime lor.
but den still managed to finish it in time.
passed by 2 ssseconds.
wat a timing. lols.
but still ok lah.
after running. my body cannot tahan.
den getting more and more giddy.
den cannot tahan.
almost fainted.
and
i broke down and cried.
*cry cry*
mr tay treat me and yi drink. h2O. hahas.
den he "opened" toilet for us to bathe.
and we actually bathed in the male staff toilet.
paing. very paiseh.
but no choice. must make myself feel fresher. so went and bathe. dun care liao.
hmmm.
after dat was bio.
mr peck teaches us those sexual reproductions.
dam those ppl dam horny de lah
piang girls somemore.
not feelin shy de meh?
hmmm.
wat else?
we ponn geo remidial.
not our fault lor.
mr quek nv come.
when we want go le den he come
we hack care lah.
jus walk off.
after not long. saw pohchiew walk out too.
so i suppose dat there's no geo.
so wont be scolded bah.
hahas.
went back home.
bathed den went out again.
went to cp wib sis.
i sort of pull her out wib me?
sshe had exams tml.
oh god.hahas. bad bad me.
hmmm.
stayed there dam long lor.
borrowed 3 books.
lalalas.
dunno able to finish it or not.
but try my best bah.
dar reminded me a thing during bio lesson.
todae. was the 32 day which i left him.
considered as 31 or 32 daays?
i not sure.
onli noe dat its 1 mth.
i dunno. i mth ago. where did i got this courage.
to do such stupid things to him and to me.
wondered how did i managed to endure through tis period.
how many times did i cried over tis period.
how much stupid thoughts came to me.
how much misses i hab wib me.
yr words;yr voice;yr care;yr love.
no longer here anymore.
regretted so wat?
nth could be done.
keep quiet bah.
silence.
oh god. feeling giddy again.
ytd whole night. i was giddy. dam giddy.
now im feeling giddy again.
wth.
hmm. die le die le.
theEnd;DD
4/25/2007 08:49:00 PM
jus got home. after bathing jiu kana pulled out by sis ler.
went to buy dinner for us.
i saw derrick. he walked pass me. hahas.
hmmm.
had a quick dinner.
lols.
eat too fast liao.
now stomach not feeling well.
lols.
let me tell you guys wat happen todae bah.
hahas.
hmm. let me think.
morning. first period was chinese
tan teck meng nv come sia. dam shiok.
hahas. but also not good lah.
i wanna get back my chinese paper 1 de results.
paper 2 got back le.
got 49/70.
its the 1st time i ever got so high bah.
hahas. dam happy de.
hmm. but im worried for my paper 1.
think i wrote almost all rubbish. not hoping to get high marks bah.
but at least get a pass?
hmmm. after chinese was. geo.
we hab our geo test.
hmmm. kind of diffcult. cos i didnt study much.
=xx
wrote lots of rubbish which i thinks it right.
hahas. LOLS.
dunno will get how much sia.
hahas.
recess nth much happened.
but i got extra ingredient in my rice.
yuckkksss...
dam it lor.
dunno wat is dat.
eeeee...
hmm.
after dat its F&N
well.. miss goh wasnt here todae again.
so we actually hab free period. but we hab to do somework.
pair work.
gonna cook again.
hahahas.
dunno how will it turn out nor.
so afraid.
hahas.
after was VE.
and dat mr tay actually forgot to bring up my results slip.
morning i actually reminded him.
yet he forgotten. called me to after all my lesson den go find him.
hmm. eng period. miss siow sort of scolded us.
cos got alot ppl nv hand in their homework to her.
dun worry. i got hand in mine.hahas
den she scolded us for almost 30 mins. sadd.
miss siow rarely scold ppl de.
guess we sure made her dam dam angry.
todae was a peaceful day. hahahs.
todae got 2 CCA groups had their SYF.
hmm. guzheng went off early in the morning.
coming back wib a silver. well done girls!
hahas
so happy for meiting. cos she lead the group? hahas
reali well done.
its the first time they join SYF. and they bring back a silver.
hahas. well. choir. i had not yet get to noe wat award they got.
wondering. how well did they fare.
hmmm.
after chem remidial. i took bus back home.
guess wat happen?
greendale kids are dam childish.
play play play play.
play water somemore.
i kana too lor.
i dun care them lah.
i jus shouted to tis particular guy who splash water on me.
dam pissed off de lor.
got splash water for nth lor.
den was like throughout the whole trip.
he was trying to splash water at his fren.
wa piang.
to tis particular greendale sec 1 or 2 kid:
why cant you jus grow up?
secondary sch liao. not primary kids anymore.
and dont you noe dat water is percious in singapore?
there are so much campaign calling us to save water.
telling us dat water is precious.
omg. so big liao.
and somemore.
you are in public place.
not yor home.
behave yrself lah. kids.
if the floor has too much water made by you.
and it happens dat. an ah ma walk pass and she falls?
wat if she falls?
did you ever think of dat before?
you lucky sia. todae mood not bad.
lucky she was not in sch to make me bad mood.
if not. you will got scolded by me non stop.
really.
i will reali scold you dao. you lose all yr face in front of yr frens
and the public.
you reali went too far sia.
and yr sorry was like.
said in a very bad attitude.
change yr attitude larh kid.
you spoiled my mood nor.
dam. dunno why im afraid of those unknown water found anywhere.
i will go thinkin alot.
dunno wats that water.
find it dirty nor.
whereas ppl in sch after they wash hand they splash me de water.
at least i know dat the water its clean.
not like jus now dat guy's water.
i dunno him. and also i dunno wats the story behind dat botter of water nor.
dunno why i find it uneasy. den like find dat the water very dirty.
hmmm. dunno why got tis kind of feeling.
maddy me. lalalalas.
well i hab to see her tml.
i dun want larh.
theEnd;DD
4/24/2007 07:14:00 PM
oh ya! forgot to add tis in.
todae me and tlt almost got knock by car.
and its MDM SEE's car.
wa piang.
she dunno howw to drive sia.
students crossing the road.
and its zebra crossing too.
dam it. mdm see sucks?
oh god. we were shock sia.
how can a sch teacher drive like tis?
and yet. she knows dat it zebra crossing. yet she speed up.
oh god. we are lucky.
reali lucky.
if not you wont be able to see us now? LOLS
*touchwood touchwood*
theEnd;DD
4/23/2007 06:12:00 PM
omg. i had a hard time bathing.
my legg hurts. all thanks to dat pair of sch shoes of mine.
got blisters. the skin sort of drop off?
eeee.. painful sia.
todae walk walk kinda of slow de.
cos even if plaster was put on. it still hurts alot.
dam.
due to our surprised. dat girl didnt talk to us all.
not a single word at all.
kind of pissed off by her actions still.
we were at miss siow's lesson. and she informed us somethings
den dat girl was inform.
due to her CCA she cant attend.
den was like keep raising up her hand and try to get miss siow's attention.
but den.
i was thinking lah.
since miss siow is busy. got question why cant she walk over to miss siow there and excpect dat
miss siow will come over. she's busy. and god gave you a pair of legs.
why dont you use it wisely?
hmmm. ytd i started playing O2jam.
hmmm. dunno how to explain dat game.
i spend almost 5 hours dling the installer. dam
hahas.
we had our weekly lunch outing again.
and. tlt had a messy lunch again. hahas. i took the pics. before and after.
but im lazy to upload it.
but todae better le lah. not so messy.
hahahas. den wat else? erm
walk around CP. den once we went to minitoons.
oh god. suddenly. jingyi showed me a bear wib a flower. piang.
dam dam cute. reali cute sia.
den i was like oh my god. its reali reali cute. hahas.
im mad.
hmmm. den there got those flowers right?
sherr sae want buy gib me.
sure. buy for me lor.
she sae she buy for me 3 of them.
cos. it represents i love you.
hahas. den i tell her. buy me a bouquet better.
hahas. every girls wanna recieve a bouquet of flowers wat.
hahas. although is fren gib de. its also good.
the feeling is also good de.
wahahahas.
sherr im waiting. hahahs
oh ya.
ppl dun ever go to our sch de general office.
dam sucks lah.
nv to get them to get things done for you.
we are students onli.
i jus wants you to get a photocopy of my results
isit dam difficult?
ask me to get it frm my form teacher.
and dat form teacher of mine.
totally sucks.
i asked frm him the results for days.
i asked tempestt to remind him lah.
you noe wat he sae?
'叫她来求我啦。求我。'
wtf. tis type of teacher oso got.
form teacher somemore.
dam bu shuang him lor.
sure got scolded by mummy todae again.
not i dun want take lei. if the people dun want gib me wat.
wat can i do?
mr tay todae absent frm sch.
general office dun hab my report book.
dam.
dar call me call my parents to call up the sch.
but you think they care?
dam fcuk up.
oh ya. todae. all my friends gone mad todae.
wat happen to you all sia.
all zhi high.
den i was like at there wondering. wat happened to them?
hahas.
LOLS.
but ovverall they still alright lah.
we went searching for Hp accesseries. saw few quite nice de.
need let them know dden we buy. hahas.
wooo.. now go play O2jam lalalalalas.
theEnd;DD
4/23/2007 05:03:00 PM
我问为什么
那女孩传简讯给我
而你为什么
不解释低着头沉默
我该相信你很爱我
不愿意敷衍
我还是明白
你已不想挽回什么
想问为什么
我不再是你的快乐
可是为什么却苦笑说
我都懂了
自尊常常将人拖着
把爱都走曲折
假装了解
是怕真相
太赤裸裸
狼狈比失去难受
我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起作梦
我怀念的是争吵以后
还是想要爱你的冲动
我记得那年生日
也记得那一首歌
记得那片星空最紧的右手
最暖的胸口
谁记得
谁忘了
想问为什么
我不再是你的快乐
可是为什么
却苦笑说我都懂了
自尊常常将人拖着
把爱都走曲折
假装了解是怕
真相太赤裸裸狼狈
比失去难受
我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起作梦
我怀念的是争吵
以后还是想要爱你的冲动
我记得那年生日
也记得那一首歌
记得那片星空最紧的右手
最暖的胸口
谁忘了
我怀念的是无言感动
我怀念的是绝对炽热
我怀念的是你很激动求我原谅抱得我都痛
我记得你在背后
也记得我颤抖着
记得感觉汹涌最美的
烟火最长的相拥
谁爱得太自由
谁过头太远了
谁要走我的心
谁忘了那就是承诺
谁自顾自地走
谁忘了看着我
谁让爱变沉重
谁忘了要给你温柔
我怀念的我还有想要爱你的冲动
我记得那年生日
也记得那一首歌
记得那片星空最紧的右手
最暖的胸口
我放手
我让座
假洒脱
谁懂我多么
不舍得太爱了
所以我
没有哭
没有说
theEnd;DD
4/21/2007 07:39:00 AM
im back back back.
early morning jiu went out.
hahas. went to meet sherr at busstop.
when walking. i slowly slowly walk to busstop.
cos. dat same old stupiid shoe again.
hahas.
in the end when i reach there. the bus went away.
haiis.
hahas.
den we stand awhile. den another bus come le.
hmmm. when on bus. tlt msg me.
said dat we were surppose to meet at sengkang.
dden we was like wat the?
on bus liao den she msg come.
so in the end we meet at kovan. hahas.
i drank mango green tea.
long time no drink le.
hmm. dden wait for tlt to come.
hmm. when tlt reach le. we went to eat.
while eating. smth dam funny happen.
as we were sitting beside the window. theres tis particlual uncle walk pass.
and hor he look at us. and stick out his tongue.
onli me and sherr saw it wat so we started laughing non stop.
we was like thinking what is he trying to do? LOLS.
after eating. we started shopping. hahas.
walk till minitoons there.
we was shocked! minitoons is closing ddown.
theres up till 70% sale.
hahas. we went in nor. see whether got anything to buy. went in.
den tlt saw a bagg. she liked it so she bought it.
i bought a necklaces. butterfly one..
hahas.
oh ya. i rmb smth dam funny. while walking somewhere.
theres alot of ppl ma. hab to squeeze through. den yihrue pushed me.
so i turn 180degrees. den sherr behind me.
she turn me back.
dam dam funny.
wat stupid thing i done todae. hahas. den we when to meet the other guides.
and we went bowling. hahas. nice nice.
but my ball keep going to the drain. LOLS.
hahas. but den my marks still not bad lah. the 2nd last onli.
hahas. =xx
tired tired tired. but we did hab fun.
hahas. but its not like a POP (pass out parade) bah.
oh ya. jus now went to friendster. den was looking at my friends profile.
den went into des de profile nor.
his song there.
omg. canon.
i want lei. i've been lookin for tis song for ages.
when i wanna go kope frm him dat time. found dat he offline liao.
haiis. no fate.
hmmm.. wonder wats next.
lalalalas.
theEnd;DD
4/21/2007 05:58:00 AM
wat another day i spent.
todae dam bu shuang de. not in good mood. all cos of her lah.
she is making scolding fcuk sia.
i hardly say tis out of my mouth.
hmm.
i talked back to her todae.
during maths. we was doing histogram?
think so.. den we need to draw cumulative graph.
need to draw the frequency densities graph.
den need to find the nums wat.
den i forgot how to find le.
so ask sherr. sherr was jus beside me.
so i asked her. i asked how to find the frequency densitie.
before sherr could answer me. she chap in telling me wat to do.
den i was like dam dam bu shuang le. cos english lesson dat time. later den i sae more.
now is dat. she chap in right? den i jus say back to her, '我有跟你讲话吗?'
den she diam diam turn back. den i saw her drawing her table very hard.
she used alot of force to vandalise it. after drawing she rubb it away.
when i see her do dat.
my blood boils more.
i jus like turn side ways. so i wont be able to see wat she's doing.
den after maths. she went out of the class first. we was later abit.
den i walk out i saw her standing outside waiting for us.
when i walk out. den she start walking.
so i told tempestt they all we walk another way.
i dun wanna see her. den while walking to next class.
i was telling jingyi tis.
'how much do i wish dat i jus now shout at her telling her dat. we dun need you to wait for us.
you can jus walk first. we no need you to wait.'
im dam dam dam pissed off lor.
ok back to english class.
another case which makes me angry.
dam.
we were suppose to do group work.
but sherr did it at home.
so we onli need to do editing. plus writing it down into the actual paper.
we were like talking away. while bernice edits the work.
so we chatted. me;sherr;yi;tempestt.
at first i wasnt into theri conversation. they were talking bout their phones.
sae alot ppl take K800i.
den sae their family members alot take dat.
tok tok tok.
den some one ask later who present the work.
den i was like saying
me and tempestt wont be doing cos the last time we presented.
den sherr won be doing cos. she did the work.
and now it wont be bernice cos she's doing the editing.
den i wanna gib jingyi write one you noe?
den she chap in say i want write i want write.
den she snatch off the A3 size paper.
dam lah tis means dat she wont be presenting. and yi will.
wth.
ok lor. we let her write. guess wat?
when bernice is done. its her turn to do her job.
and we continue to chat. den tok tok tok till half.
she chap in
stop her hand for so long.
and everyone noe dat miss siow wants us to finish our work as soon as possible.
and she still can stop her hand for very long.
tok tok tok and tok.
even laugh untill very loud. dam it.
cannot stand her liao
so i took over her pen and dat piece of paper. noe wat she sae?
wanna write finish liao. you take away dat paper for wat?
dam. i wanna tok back to her sae. you keep talking nv do work. write so slow.
but den i didnt. i jus told her no time liao.
den she quickly write finish.
den chap into our conversation again.
once again. i saw her diao us.
the stupid thing is dat.
she even diao TLT.
fcuk sia. tlt did nth.
and yet she diao her.
not happy come lah. do these type of thing for wat? onli noe how to diao.
monday i sure gib you attitude let you see.
let you see wat kind of stupid attitiude you gave us.
and last thing! you are pushing the limit. dun go too far. a person's limit is limited.
stop pushing.
onli spoils both of our mood.
kiies. den wanna sae CI de thing. erm.
sits beside me was. tempestt.
den dunno why she walk away.
den mr yeo came sitting beside me. den start joking wib us.
hahas
his new name called susan yeo.
so next time call him mr susan yeo.
hahas.
den he stated to help us suan ming.
hahas. wanna see who is the cleverest among us.
den show him our palm. den guess wat?
he sae me and sherr the cleverest.
LOLS. den still got dunno wat thing. oso me and sherr tio.
den mr yeo sae my palm right. is duan zhang.
heard before lah. sis told me before.
my palm very rare one. reali.
hahas.
den mr yeo sae. i wont spend alot of money will save one. whereas sherr will use alot of money.
hahas.
den he oso got sae wat. got duan zhang de ren ming dou bu hao.
dunno real or not. den mr tay oso come see my palm. he oso sae hao xiang is bu hao. dunno
nv rmb carefully. den i found out poh chiew de palm oso like dat. duan zhang.
see arh. at first he sae. i clever. den sae i dunno wat. (oso good thing lah)
den he sae i save money.
den now he sae i duan zhang not very good.
wat he toking seh. funny hahas.
den mr yeo sae he go help me check whether its good or not. den tell me.
den he sort of like see my palm again. den oso see my ear. dunno for wat de lor.
funny him. hmm.. palm reading sure its nice.
theEnd;DD
4/19/2007 03:55:00 PM
天冷冷灰灰的。心情也跟着天一样变得灰灰的。
一点也不想讲话，心里有种不安的感觉那该怎么办呢？
手脚酸痛不已， 走起路来很吃力， 就像个老人一样。
早上时天空就像是随时就要下雨， 那时正在听在听林宇中的淋雨中。
很想去淋雨
*看到她我就很不爽， 她脸臭得很
不爽就让你不爽 我也很不爽你啦。
也不知道你一天到晚在那你不爽什么。
dar shouldnt pass the SS slides print out to you nor. should wait till she come ask you for the slides den you pass it to her. if she doesnt care bout her SS so wat for? give her for wat?
she didnt sae anything bout it. and she will lost it for sure de lor. for sure.
give you also no use. you should get it frm her. not dar gib you de lor. think carefully lah. still at there bu shuang. we do things still thought of you de lei. still like that bu shuang. let you bu shuang nor. in class slp slp slp. let you slp all you want nor. dun care you. still at there say you like miss siow's lesson. den why do you still slp in her class? every lesson you sure will slp de. slp somemore lah. going to be pig liao. piggy you. slp all you want lah.
got that feeling going to quarrel soon real soon.
you totally suckss lah you. cannot stand you liao.
opps someone is falling aslp beside me liao.
i know morning i at there uneasy wat le. recess that time smth happen to tlt.
she had her 2.4 den she got stomach cramp. painn till she cried. oh god. so heart pain. we dunno wat to do sia. onli sit down there keep askin her ok not. make her drink water. haiis.
*written on 1240hours*
i reali cant stand dat girl anymore. she noes dat we had our presentation ytd.
and yet she can at there ask us. we presented ytd le hor?
WA PIANG.
theEnd;DD
4/19/2007 07:44:00 AM
生命是如此的脆弱，
人是如此的软弱
有很多事是我们无法想通的。
爱情到底是什么东西？
这我问题或许缠绕了许多人
但是没人能成功地为这个问题找出个答案
爱情能让人完全变了样
可以让人失去理智
人常说当一个人爱得越深时
他也就会伤得越深。。。
也有人常说爱一个人就要让她快乐
能看见她开心就心满意足了不是吗？
分手时，那是需要多少的勇气？
必须把所有的事情全都忘记
分手有很多原因
要是爱他就让他走，或许他会活得开心一点
也许就开心那么一点吧
是时候该放手就该放手
一直对他抱有所有的希望
就该全都必须抛到一边
不能再想了。完全都不能再想了。
越是去想，心里就越痛
要是在一起时不开心那就更因该放他走
让他呼吸一下新鲜空气也不是一个坏办法
人也常说这段恋情失败了
下一段会更好
天下有这种事吗?
一个问号， 永远的问号
要如何放手， 才能放得彻底?
也必须把这段回忆也一起放掉吗？
那友情与又是什么？
朋友是人们最需要的
朋友陪伴着我们一起长大
一起经历许许多多的事
我们一起拥有着许多许多共同的回忆
那些欢乐，悲伤的事
都会牢牢的锁在我们的内心里
是不会被望的
但当你对朋友感到反感时又能怎么呢?
那些的不满又能向谁说？
再不满也都要把它们放在心里不能让他知道
但那位朋友以挑战大家的耐信了
我们还能忍耐下去吗？
theEnd;DD
4/19/2007 07:15:00 AM
hey! todae its wednesday.
another day hab passed.
todae early morning. hab PE.
guess wat?
we did our 2.4km run.
paing dam dam hot. reali.
and as usual. i failed it by a min.
dam larh.
every year the same. sure must retake once den will pass.
hahas.jingyi jus give up. run run run den dun run le.
haiis. but i finished my whole 5 rounds. hmm.
we hab to run again next week. siian.
after running. my whole body no energy wor.
drank lot and lots of water. lucky i didnt faint.
hope tlt tml wont faint.
like dat time like dat sccared me.
hmm. wat else?
oh yarh!
i didnt hand in my compo to miss siow.
oh no.
hmmm tml i sure will hand in to her.
think my paper its wib sherr?
oh ya sae till compo.
it makes my blood boils.
dat she lar.
everyone after 2.4 got no more energy le.
she still ask us. 'eh someone can help me do smth not?'
i was like tok back to her sae dat 'everyone after 2.4 no energy liao still call us do thing'
wat the.
den noe wat she sae?
'no larh. no need require much energy. help me count the num of words in my compo can le'
piang cant you count it yrself?
everyone counts for themself. so should you.
den she went toilet. changed to her uniform.
den she came back wib a smell on her.
she sprayed dat kind of thing lah. makes her feel more nice.
dat type dunno wats dat called.
den was like dam heavy. the smell very strong. den i dun like the smell ma
so find it very awful. tao yan.
wat else do i wanna complain?
hmmm. oh ya.
once again. i was diao-ed by her again.
reali reali pissed off larh. jus because i didnt help her to pass the paper to miss siow.
and she diao me. not happy i let you at there not happy larh.
let you diao de gou lah.
i told sherr tis 'diao lah diao me again see wat i do to you.
onli noe how to diao ppl. not happy arh? come lah.' i told her in a very angry tone.
oh ya. chem dat time.
we was doing practical.
den im washing the test tubes. den.
she told me wat?
'erm you go do yr thing i help you wash the test tubes'
i was like 'erm no need lah i wash myself'
dam. jus now not happy diao me.
den now so good help me wash test tube.
piang. fake enough.
after chem, very fast she disappear wor. went for her chior.
next lesson was SS. noe wat? we were suppose to present our ppt to the class.
and yet she's the PRESENTER. and she went for her CHIOR.
dam lah. she noes dat we are presenting. and yet she didnt turn up.
later 30 mins or so will die? the project got marks de. and will be added into CA.
tempestt and bernice can excusse themselves for the prefect thingy. why cant you?
den ended up tempestt and bernice presenting.
cos me yi and sherr we did the slides.
we came to tis conculsion de.
she, tempestt and bernice be the presenter. while
me sherr and yi get the slides done.
she herself volunter herself to be the presenter.
den where is she? chior.
doesnt care bout the presentation at all.
we quarrel the other time cos. she said dat we didnt let her noe the progress. den nv let her see the slides. nv ask her to do anything.
WTH. den come unhappy.
soo many times we saw her online. nv once did she asked us bout the project.
nv once ask us to send her the copy of ppt. so dat she could take look. NV ONCE.
den at there saying so much blaming dat its my fault?
she told someone dat she msg me and asked me.
noe wat she asked? she ask bout BIO. yet she claims dat she asked bout SS.
im totally fedup wib all these nonsense you are giving us lah.
dam it.
den while the girls are presenting.
look at sherr. and she told me smth. she saw her standing quite a distance away frm the classroom. looking into the class.
hab time to stand outside there and watch. why didnt she came in and join the presentation?
see enough le arh? do you noe dat you did nth? i keep wanna help you. helping you so dat you still will get marks for yr SS.
but now you are making me feel dat. its not worth to help you.
jingyi very much wanna tell miss farah. dat you didnt do anything. but i stopped her.
den we were at there wondering. wat will happen when we told miss farah?
wat if miss farah went to tok to her. and she said dat we didnt let her do anything? but yes we did let her do smth. do the presentation den. but where were you? walking around doing nth!
dam dam. if you said these to miss farah. i gonna be angry like hell.
i told yi smth. i got this feeling. i will quarrel wib her once more. reali once more. she did nth.
goshh.
thinking of her sure makes me bad mood.
theEnd;DD
4/18/2007 06:00:00 AM
todae its the 17 of april.
as usual i dun feel like toking todae.
but no choice i still tok.
hab chinese as the first period.
nth much tok bout singers.
mr tan lor. gib us the article.
hmm. after dat was geo.
its was like dam dam obvious where they are bringing me to le.
but still dun want admit lor. wth.
i dun care.
dam dam obvious lah. junyang sae abit.
hanjun sae abit.
leslie sae abit.
i noe le lor. hahas. but den they keep toking to themself.
den i sitting in the middle of them ma. den keep tok and tok.
but den they cant let me noe. wat they toking.
den tempestt jiu sae. aiya. marr. why dun you change sit.
den i hack lah. i dun want change. but den.
i went infront to sit. LOLS. let them tok de gou.
hmmm. dun care them le. hahas.
erm. den th much happen le lah. oh ya. recess dat time.
the her keep turn back and look at us. hmm. i was like wat the?
why keep looking at us. cannot stand sia. stare somemore lah.
hmm. after sch. me and sherr chiong back home.
bathe quickly. change quickly. and went out of the house.
i reali bathe fast fast nor.
my shoe was dam dam loose. walk few steps den i need to make my shoe.
cos dropping out. cannot walk fast fast.
hahas. as for sherr. her pants dropping.
so she walk few steps hab to pull.
den wat else? i tot we were going paris ris. but ended up tampines.
we waited around 30-40 mins for dat guy?
was like dat there keep standing. and standing.
till we fedup we went to tampines mall.
bought pen refill for jingyi. den walk off back to mrt to meet him.
sherr. called him. and she was like searching for him.
but nth. i turned around. the first person i spotted was him.
cant confirm dat its him. but there was a feeling which tells me dat its him.
den reali its him. sherr walked towards him. while i walked slowly there.
at dat point. my heart totally sank down. dam moody.
i dunno y.
he acted like theres nth bah.
but i feel dat i should be the one who act dat theres nth going on.
but i jus cant. and felt moody.
i cant help it lah.
hmm. went to take mrt to simei.
in the mrt. i knocked my head. the 2nd time. first time was. i knock my head on the bus.
dam. *pain pain* i keep rou my head.
reach there. sherr went to take her spects. hmm. funny bah?
but not bad.
hmm. went to hab our dinner. food court nth to eat. so went to long john eat.
hmm.
the guys there very funny. laugh and laugh. very loud.
real loud..
hmm.
dunno why. i wasnt myself dat moment.
i do wat sure got mistake de.
i dunno why. not myself. cos moody?
i did smth funny. 5 times. or even 6?
hmmm. we tok mrt back to paris ris. den took bus back home.
on the bus. we tok tok tok.
den sherr tok dao i wanna cry sia. reali i almost cried.
but i feel like crying. but in the end my tears didnt flow down.
*well done marr?*
hmmm. den in the end both also moody.
haiis. why must things always turing out tis way?
history repeating itself? oh god.
hey dun anyhow think lah.
theEnd;DD
4/17/2007 09:19:00 AM
hahas. wat a day i ha spend todae.
nth special actually. hmm
as usual morning meet tlt den go sch together.
but. she was late. so hahas. i hab to wait.
listen to songs. while waiting for her.
hmm. wat else?
oh ya. she changed her bagg. its nice lah. but doesnt reali suit her. =x
so.. i cant sae much. jus let it be. ya? hahas.
hmm. tlt told me smth in the morning.
i was online ytd night.
i was like wat the? i was slping at dat moment le.
how am i be able to online?
hahas. werid.
mama was playing at dat moment.
den tlt saes. GQ keep complaining to her. sae tok to me i nv reply. so tlt oso come tok to me.
heard dat she keep at there lalalala. but too bad i cant see.
paiseh arh. reali sorry.
let you all tok to the air.
hahas.
went to cp todae. hab lunch.
as usual monday was the day we hab our once a week ''lunch outing''
hahas.
laugh and laugh there.
we saw a very funny thing.
hahahas. we got took a pic down. but i didnt get frm them. got see their blog. they might hab post it. hahas dat thing its real funny.
done by those small kids frm PEIHUA.
reali small kids seh. hahaas
todae. she keep toking to me. dunno why i jus dun feel like toking to her.
she tok to me. i jus smile back at her.
nth to tok.
feel reali very disgusted realli.
haiis.
everyone is moody now. moody moody. siian.
he asked for my bloglink frm sherr. den sherr couldnt rmb so ask frm me.
feel reali weird. y suddenly want my bloglink. erm. jus gib nor. didnt think so much.
the most stupid thing is dat. i couldnt rmb link. =xx opps.
when sherr send the msg liao. i was at there think. did i blog anything?
hmmm. den they at there keep saying got got got. hahas. den like want scare me like dat.
hahas.
nvm de lah. wat i feel i write it down. dats wat my blog for ma.hahas.
but still i went into his blog. saw his newest post.
like kind of sad bah. haiis.
ppl ma. but stay happy. me. exceptional.
i can be sad. you all cant.
hahahas.
LOLS.
hmmm. tml think i gonna pon F&N?
or better not? 1 hr.
if go den i gonna meet sherr after sch.
i mean after my F&N.
den hab to bring clothes to sch and change very ma fan lei.
but think i will go for F&N den meet sherr.
i cant afford to skip F&N lessons.
*i very much wish to let go everything. and fell into deep slp.
theEnd;DD
4/16/2007 05:13:00 AM
hmm.. bored bored bored.
dats wat i could sae.
didnt feel like doing homework.
so. i left all blank.
hmmm. slacker now.
omg..
erm. getting more and more moody nowadaes le.
oh god. jiuming arh.
theEnd;DD
4/15/2007 09:01:00 AM
hellos.
wat an opening i made hahas.
lame lame.
hmmm. todae its our sch's sports day.
lalas. wat a hot day it is todae. dam dam hot.
sherr was at there helping block the sun.
i simply hate punggolites lah.
'tell you all how many times you cant walk through. ting bu dong shi ma?
need me teach you how to listen to english?' dam it.
dam hot lor. and yet you all make us angry.
wth.
lalalas. but at least tis year atitla wasnt the last.
hahas. secoond last. hahas. better den nth. wahahas
went to hougang mall after the whole event.
den headed to tlt's house.
den at her house we tok tok tok.
den we tok bout. nowadays they seems to be copying me. wat i do they will do as well
examples like:
i likes purple;JJlin girl 'W' starts to copy me!.
dam. dat day still come and tell me. now i like the male singer are 5566 & JJ.
dam lah. somemore she say she kai shi feng JJ. wth. everyones noe dat im dam crazy over JJ. no body can snatch. and yet she told me dat. dam pissed off lah. i bu shuang le. dam bu shuang.
oh ya. rmbed one thing!
dat time i was bringing shoulder bagg to sch ma keep changing bagg to sch.
den once she told me. she wanna buy new bagg the best is shoulder bagg. wa piang.
example no.2.
dat time after i got a new haircut. i use those black long clips to clip my fringe. got once girl 'F'
told me. 'you like dat clip very cute, i oso want to like dat clip le.'
at dat time i tot she was jus joking. den nowadaes. where i didnt clip my fringe le she started to clip like wat i clip last time. wa piang.
now den i noe i got so much things to let them copy seh.
dam dam pekcek.
wahahahahas.
after go tlt house. walked over to blk 426 meet my mummy
to attend a malay wedding. erm. frankly speaking lah.
sitting down there makes you feel dam weird.
its like you are surrounded by malays.
felt reali uneasy.
hmm.. mango green tea is nice.
lalalalas.
hmmm, felt reali sleeply now. going to slp soon le. hahas
hmm. why did you started to msg me again when i wanna give up. i reali trying my best not to think bout anything that is related to you? and like always asking bout her? im jus too sensative or wat lah. but dats shows dat you still care bout me? the conversation we had ytd. shows me dat. you somehow changed? the talkative you is somehow back. dats a good thing bah. not bad. dam it. i dun wish you to give me false hope. i wanna let go. its torturing. once you msged me. i will like always thinking dat you will msg me again. i dun want dat. stupid feelings are coming out again. stop them!..
theEnd;DD
4/14/2007 12:04:00 AM
todae nth much happen. got mother tongue mock exams.
not much confidence lah. very sleeply.
haiis. todae did stupid stupid things todae.
song time~~~
lalalalas. sherr hai mei you shang lai zhao wo.
theEnd;DD
4/13/2007 07:13:00 AM
hmmm. such a bad day i hab todae?
2nd lesson of the day was CHEM. its such a bad time bah.
i quarrelled wib dat girl. xin.
eeee. dam fed up at dat moment.
real real angry lor.
everyone seems to be like lookin and discussing bout us.
esp jas and amanda.
idoit.
hmmm. wat else?
erm. we quarrel over the SS project thing. den recess hor.
im reali angry ma. den toktoktok to rue rue and tlt. tell den very angry lah.
tlt oso complain bout her project group.
dam lah. all very pissed off.
after maths remidial.
we went home nor.
i went to cp wib tlt.
den at busstop there we dunno why we start toking bout things those things.
hmm. tlt told me dat farhana go complain to ppl sae i DIAO her. piang where got such things?
onli rmb recess dat time. she block my way ma. i look at her. den bad mood ma. cos quarrel wib xin. den she go complain to ppl sae i diao her. wa piang. WTH. i didnt ok. anyhow sae me.
den i started doing stupid things.
i get ppl to diao me.
first is sherr. she diao me..
den i keep asking diah wee to diao me. but she dun want no matter how i call her. she jus dun want.
next tlt. she keep laughing and laughing and laughing. den tell me she dunno how to diao. so i fang guo ta.
den is jingyi. she funny lor she. oso dunno. after dat. is leslie. he oso dun want to diao me. wth. no one wants to diao me. gib them a chance dun want. den after dat. saw zalina and suhaila. den. both they diao me. hahahas. wanna ask hanjun de. but he too far away frm me. hahas.
den in bus. i asked aslin to diao me as well hahas. she did yes she did diao me. hahas.
funny seh.
tml i shall go to sch and gather ppl's diao. hahas.
you noe? collection. hahahas. maddy me. hmm.
hahahahahas.
theEnd;DD
4/12/2007 07:06:00 PM
hahas. back back again. hmm. its raining right now.
how i wish i can get out and play wib the rain right now.
how i wish. ya how i wish.
morning someone msg me. its him. haiis. repiled nor. im not dat kind of dun reply ppl msg de ren.
hmmm.
i was hitten by sherr todae wib a floor ball stick. pain pain. lucky no blue black
but shandy jiu hen ke lian. poor shandy. she got hitten by sherr on her leg. and
it was blue black. sherr todae very violent.
got once. i almost got hitten in the face. lucky im still a few steps away frm her. if not my face no more le. hahas. hmm. very mad todae. during PE hahahas.. fun bah. running like mad. den hair wet dao like raining like dat. how i wish i can bathe. hahas. very very sticky. hmm. den i took back my phone frm teacher. den saw his reply. reply back nor.
his deleting his friendster? or someone else i dunno. den msg back. i repiled dam short onli. 2 words. 'oohh. okok.' dats all. after dat he got repiled back. somehow caring bout me. asked questions like now schooling? got eat anything ma?
hmm. maybe jus normal friends care bah.
i decided dat i wanna forget bout him le. but his msg made me so dunno wat to do. whether to let go? or wat. dam larh. irritating thoughts i got.
todae we hab our ss poster presenting. can do better de. but den. im too nervous liiao. i was at there shaking. cos we are the first. dam funny lah. we left our poster wib miss farah. den miss farah asked me to collect it frm her went she wants to start the presenting of posters. hahas..
den i took the poster and walked back to my place. before dat. me and sherr was like at there discussing dat. 'think miss farah will call us sia. our poster wib her. somemore we are the first to finish it. and was like at there do nth.' okok. den miss farah keep asking which group wanna go first? no one bother. no one wants to be first. den she sae. alright den she shall call by index num. if you hab tis index num in yr group you will go up and present. and so. cos i didnt noe all of us de index num. on jingyi's desk. i place the SS paper on it has our index num. so i took it in front of me.. den i scare later miss farah call us we dunno ma. so i refer to the paper. den i jus got the paper in front of me. den she saes '17' oh god. its tempestt index num. hahahahas. dam funny. me;sherr;yi was at there laughing and laughing. den heard jasmine said. 'see they laugh untill like dat sure is them de lah' hahas. so we went up nor. dam funny. den in the end. after al of us hab presented. miss farah was like not happy. sae dat. onli my group and queenie's group de poster is acceptable. others not acceptable some has to redo. hahas. and so. we went to trick bernice and tempestt. hahas. bad hor we? hahas. they all shock went we sae dat. onli 2 groups de she accept. hahas. we lucky lah we. but i still find ours de best. best best. hahas. nice nice.
tml another presentation. jiiayou arh.
theEnd;DD
4/11/2007 07:17:00 PM
back home heree to blog. bout wat happen after F&N bah.
hahas. after F&N was VE.
as usual mr tay tok tok tok &tok. hmm. he gave us see a piece of paper.
whether are you miss 'dont bother''
or the miss dunno wat erm its like got example one. exmple dat you got a donation need to call ppl donate you will get $20 frm yr mum and return it to teacher. blah blah blah. and third one is dunno wat erm. i onli rmb examples. third one is. you will organise those trips to the less fortunate ones. blah blah blah watever lah. forgot le.
hahas. den he ask which one are we.
im not sure. abit on each bah. depends on which matters larhs..
hmmm. before dat mr tay wants to get ppl to help out for the sports day. the games.
too bad i got duty hahas.. erm.
xin and yi doesnt hab anything to do. so they were selected. but the thing is they are not so willing to do it lah.
lunch time dat time. my mood totally went bad. stupid dunno why.
i attitude sherr and yi.
paiseh arh.
before dat my mood not very good le. so. in total my mood sucks after F&N.
okay?
i noe sherr tried to make me laugh. but jus cant.
hmmm. after lunch was SS. we coloured our poster nice wor. come i later den upload it let you all see. we took it wib effects. nice nice.
and we are the first group to finish it. wahahas. but we hab yet to get our speech prepared. hmmm tml bah. hahas. or maybe later i do? who is gonna present? frm we i noe right. xin;ber;temp are not going to attend ss lesson. due to certain things. erm. and so yi said dat she wont present le. watever presentation. she wont do. so left me and sherr. and sherr hates to do presentation as well. so i think no choice tml i will be the one presenting. haiis.
dunno why todae im dam blur.
i can put my story book under my bagg. after dat. when wanna leave the room. im searching for my book. dunno where i put.
den i can even forget ddat how much i bought to sch todae. i think its $15. now im thinking dat it $12. den i kept counting my money. den think ei? how come i got this amount of money left? i spend so much meh? i was calculating wib a calculater. count count count still not correct lei. den i rmb i lend rue rue. $$ during recess. and recess jus a few hours before. and yet i forgot. how much i lend her i oso forgot.
lunch. after going to the toliet. come out i saw sherr and yi. sherr passed me $2. den i think. eh? i got lend you money meh? why gib me money? den she keep repeating dat rue rue return me money. den next min. i can ask her why you gib me money.
after sch got chem remidial. we were provided wib biscuits and coffee or tea. as idun drink coffee so i drank tea. so me;ber;yi went to make the hot tea. they are instant de ma. so in packets. and. i took a tea packet. im sure i took the tea de. den next moment when i pour it into the cup i asked myself did i took the wrong packet? i tot i took coffee.
next is it hot tea right? den ber gave mi straw. as i requested. den do do do some questions. i went to drink my tea. without hesitate. i drank it wib my straw. and got scald. dam. HOT HOT!. den ber come scold me sae. the water is boiled in 100degree. and the hot water i jus poured it out. den i drank it. i made tis mistake TWICE. and ber keep repeating the same thing to me. oh i bougth u weekly. and im holding it whereever i go. before recess. and while im on the bus back home. den i realise dat it can be put inside my bagg.
my god im dam dam dam blur todae lor.. dunno why.
theEnd;DD
4/10/2007 02:54:00 AM
again. im in the comp lab.
the web messenger isnt working.
unable to sign in.
oh. im crying in the lab. dam it.
reading my blog den tears start to roll down.
lucky i sit in the corner of the room.
no one sees dat im crying. or watever~
i read my blog. the tag board. gq saes im deceiving myself.
yes indeed i am. deceiving myself.
always.
im thinking too much.
yes i did.
i think alot.
ytd did smth i long ago to do de.
i actually msg him all those things i wanna sae.
cos diah told me dat. go for it bah.
by telling him. i will feel much better.
and diah too. she called her bf up..
but both of us got heartbroken.
for diah's he bluffing her again.
all lies. lies. lies.
always lies. hurt diah so much.
dam him.
for me. forget it bah. onli few words.
nth much. he doesnt wants this r/s back.
his reaction was cold.
forget it.
but telling him all those. its the last time i will do these things le bah.
let go of him. carry on wib my life.
at dat moment. i felt dat im not the orignal marilyn anymore.
fake smiles. craziie me. doing things real slow. even walking.
love can really make someone change.
leave me alone~
i dun wanna care bout tis anymore. give me lots & lots of work to do.
please.
theEnd;DD
4/09/2007 11:23:00 PM
again. im in the comp lab.
the web messenger isnt working.
unable to sign in.
oh. im crying in the lab. dam it.
reading my blog den tears start to roll down.
lucky i sit in the corner of the room.
no one sees dat im crying. or watever~
i read my blog. the tag board. gq saes im deceiving myself.
yes indeed i am. deceiving myself.
always.
im thinking too much.
yes i did.
i think alot.
ytd did smth i long ago to do de.
i actually msg him all those things i wanna sae.
cos diah told me dat. go for it bah.
by telling him. i will feel much better.
and diah too. she called her bf up..
but both of us got heartbroken.
for diah's he bluffing her again.
all lies. lies. lies.
always lies. hurt diah so much.
dam him.
for me. forget it bah. onli few words.
nth much. he doesnt wants this r/s back.
his reaction was cold.
forget it.
but telling him all those. its the last time i will do these things le bah.
let go of him. carry on wib my life.
at dat moment. i felt dat im not the orignal marilyn anymore.
fake smiles. craziie me. doing things real slow. even walking.
love can really make someone change.
leave me alone~
i dun wanna care bout tis anymore. give me lots & lots of work to do.
please.
theEnd;DD
4/09/2007 11:23:00 PM
hey. forget to tell you guys tis thing.
时钟&闹钟 is different wor.
时钟 is CLOCK.
whereas 闹钟 is ALARM CLOCK.
must make tis correct wor.
rmb.
theEnd;DD
4/09/2007 07:33:00 AM
hahas. im here to blog.
just now went to lab for F&N lessons.
didnt get to blog. cos..
the comp there simply SUCKS.
dam lagg lah. wanna sign in web messenger oso cannot. tried lots of times
just stack down there.
LOLS.
hmmm. i think i gonna change my blogg song le. hahas
hmmm. todae in sch kind of sot sot one. dunno wats wrong.
kinda of tok to xin. play & play & play.
played those stupid stupid lame games. hahas
=xx funn.
and took a dumb testt.
hahas. im 75% dumb.
hahas. sad hor?
didi got test me before. and i still can get back the same results
hahas.
finally got my dad to sign my report book.
it took me 2-3 weeks to get it sign.
the stupid thing is dat. i got it sign ytdd.
but i actually forgot to bring it todae. dam
lalalas.
the thing im afraid is dat. scaredd tml i gib mr tay.
he dun want. hmmm. dun think he will dun want de lah hor? hahas
todae dam happy de me. cos i got tis news. wahahahaha.
JJ IS COMING OUT HIS NEW ALBUM IN MAY(ithink)
hahahahahas. so happy happy. lalalas.
dam excited sia. his album finally coming out le. gonna save money liao.
hmmm. ytd he suddenly msg. i tot wat. hab the tot dat he wanna ask me back. but its jus dat im thinking too much. =xx. he asked me wat type of person is he. jus answer wat i feel nor. i can feel dat he is bothering over tis question. dunno why he got this thought. hope he's alright bah.
the last question which i didnt get a reply is dat. i asked him. dat time in msn. i told him all those things rmb? i asked for his reaction. but there's no reply.
i very much want to tell him dat. can say i had regreted for the things i have done bah.
i very much want to tell him dat. i want to noe his reaction cos i care.
i want to noe. to let my heart noe dat. you still love me?
let me noe we are still possible.
still can be together back.
kind of giving myself false hope?
at least i can feel abit more happy.
so i can let you go completly.
i never imagined dat to let you go was such a painful decision. and such a painful memory.
i made a wrong decision.
will nv made such stupid mistake again.
hahas.
anyway..
JJ'S COMING OUT ALBUM SOON.
lalalalas.
theEnd;DD
4/09/2007 02:56:00 AM
hahas. todae post so many times in a day. hmmm.
jus now mummy want play. so. hab to end my post short cant write long long. didi dun want play le. so lend me his's hahas
hmm jus now say till where lei?
to sherr and others.
hmmm. while rotting till late night ytd. i chat wib him.
told him my watever feelings. like those excuses. blah blah blah.
but den onli for my thinking onli lah. not all. part of it onli.
hmmm. i asked alot. like why didnt he make me stay larh. watever lah
like. dont you noe dat im always waiting for you to make me stay. dont you noe dat watever reasons i gave you all are jus excuses? even GQ can see dat im jus giving excuses.
ermss. his answer was jus SERIOUS?
awwww.. so means dat if i ask you to stay you will stay?
wat i said was. ''ya but you didnt''
he keep awww. didnt sae much lor.
haiis. things are like tis. so sherr. i told him le. but he like doesnt care much. so theres nth much for me to do. jus forget it bah. nobody can do anything. hmmm..
oh ya. todae's trip. we went to 3 places in total.
paris ris;tampines;hougang
hahas. we took neoprints todae. 2 machine. ilovecrash.
tis machine. nice nice. yi bought a bagg. not bad lah. i saw the clutch i wanted. nice nice. den saw another one. i love the other one more. esp the brown in colour de. like brown tis few days. hahas.
theEnd;DD
4/06/2007 09:38:00 PM
hahas. ppl. im rotting at eric's house now. siian
rotting again.
ytd rott till 2.30AM.
onli got a few hours of slp. hmmm.
morning. i hardly could open my eyes.
hmmm. hungry hungry..
later go home den i blog more. =x
theEnd;DD
4/06/2007 06:34:00 PM
im back. frm eric's house.
sherr;tlt;eric;ivan;sandy
was there doing the banner for saladin.
as me and yi was not saladin members. we jus sit there and rott nor.
nth to do.
i amost fall aslp there.
but ask frm eric a cup of tea. den jiu ok le.
not so sleeply.
hmmm.
read sherr's blog there.
hmmm. for you all de info bah.
ytd while rotting till late night.
hahas. next time den i contiinue. mummy want play liao. erm. think later i online again. den i continue my post. hahahs.
theEnd;DD
4/06/2007 05:10:00 AM
hmmm.
todae. let me recall wat i did bah.
todae i attitude her. real badly. real badly. during ss lesson.
dam fed up. unhappy jiu let her unhappy nor.
as her wish.
I DUN WANNA CARE BOUT YOU ANYMORE.
get out of my life pls you.
you you. yes you. haiis.
i reali dun wanna see her again. hahas.
hmmm. suffering frm DUMPER'S REMORSE.
hmmm. its a good thing or a bad thing? not sure.
hmmm. how come nowadeas keep feeling like crying?
oh god. everytime i sae tis to sher..
she will tell me god on top. hahas.
ellen know bout wat happened.
told her not to tell anyone.
she agreed. and i trusted her.
she called me not to be sad.
and told me wat. the next one will be better.
i dunno. den she even said wat. theres no KARMA exist.
but the thing is i dun understand wats karma. dat the thing.
asked sherr and tlt. they all dunno.
dat moment i tell her. my mood totally drop down.
feel like crying at dat moment. but i dun wanna cry in front of her. so hold my tears back. and acted to be happy bah.
dats y alot of times you will see me going totally mad.
im just an entertainer.
btw im finishing the book ''its called a breakup because its broken'' le.
den tml i can pass it to dar. let her read on it. tml going out wib them.
i will stay in the library for a long time i think.
oh yeah. i will rmb to bring camera. i wanna take PICtures, PICTUres. and PICTURES. hahas. i guess so? let me take pictures ok? hahas.
isawhisfriendstercommentbyhisfren.calledhimnottobesad.atdatpointoftimeifeltdatiseemstohabhurthimalot. icanrealisensedat.dunnoy.thinkingshouldi开口andgethimbacktome.butimtheonemakingthedecisions.itseemsdatididntconsiderhisfeelingsatall.irealidunno wattodo.iwannasae.butgotdatfeelingswhichtellsmenottodoit.butthesesanotherfeelingstellsmedati shouldtell.
cosiwillrealirealiregretsomeday.
probably. nowiregreted.
letmeliveinmyworlfulldofregretbah.
hisfriendsaskedhimtoforgotboutit.watpastitspast.
butbut.
whydidnthemademestayinthefirstplace?
whydidimadedatdecisioninthefirstplace?
didhenoesdatallthereasonsigavehimareallexcuses?
dohenoesdat.ibeencryingallthetime.
missinghim.cryingoverthestupidsthingsihabdone.
ishewillingtowaitformetillifinishmyo's?
willwegetbacktogetherlikebefore.
ifeeldatimjustactinglikeaspoiltchild.
realiaspoiltchild.
feelingsomessysomessynow.
ohgod.
theEnd;DD
4/05/2007 12:20:00 AM
im dam pissed off todae again.
she actually diao-ed me toade. dam
i was talking to tempestt bout my chem marks.
i asked her marks as well. turn dack den i saw her eyes big big
ZAI DIAO WO.
hmm. tao yan lor she.
go eat shit and die larh.
i tried to be very active. talkative todae le. but still like no use like dat.
dam her. tao yan tao yan.
hmmm..
when we are not talking to her. she will chap in and ask.
wat wat? piang no one was talking to her.
hmmm. i forgot its which time. i actually scolded.
*f**k
den sherr and jingyi come tell me.
'tis is my first time hear marr like dat sae'
hahas. well i think maybe tis is the first time bah. not sure.
hmmm. im reali pissed off lor.
er xin.
den i think during recess dat time she got complain to wan qi.
i keep seeing her looking at our direaction.
like want diao me like dat. her eyes big arh.
so? i got my eyes too. hahas.
dam i reali hate her. kind of like talk back to her during SS.
dam pekcek lah.
hmm i dun want tok bout her liao.
todae got chinese compo writing competition.
wrote one the topic 'i love rainy days' hahas
nice topic.
wanna chose the other topic de.
'ke wang kuai le'
hahas.
but in the end i chosed 'i love rainy days'
hmmm. a topic where i wrote alot of rubbish inside.
hahas. i hab to rushed out my compo.
no time*.
siian. so considered not so well done.
well i did my best bah.
hahas.
i continued reading my book 'it's called a breakup because its broken'
den there tis page which saes dat.
there's 2 condition that afflict many refugees of recent breakups.
FIRST.
the revisionist romance disorder(RRD)
those who suffered frm RRD cannot control the need to rewrtie their r/s
to match the feelings they want to have about it.
when you rewrite the past and made yr romance seems so perfect.
SECOND.
the dumper's remorse.
dumper's remorse is different from revisionist romance disorder.
becos it's not about being delude about wat kind of guy he was all along.
but rather about second-guessing yourself.
with dumper's remorse, you have seen the reality, you know he's not the one for you, and you even been brave enough to do the deed but.
when faced whith yr first weekend alone, you start ssecond-guessing.
all yr insecurities about whether you'll ever find the right guy become a breeding ground for dumper's remorse and can lead you to make some very bad decisions. like taking him back and wasting even more time in a r/s that's going nowhere.
hmmm. after reading i dunno which one i falls into.
but i feel dat i fall in the 2nd condition. the dumper's remorse.
haiis. dunno wat to do. mind is in the mess now.
told sherr somethings.
she said i regreted. hmm. i think so.
i dunno how to get him out of my mind.
and the worst thing is dat. rmb previously. i send him a msg?
i didnt get a reply. so i dunno wat to do.
im prepared for the worst. the possibility is not high bah.
im like giving myself a false hope.
wat to do? wat to do?
'god. i need fate. make me believe in fate'
theEnd;DD
4/04/2007 06:04:00 PM
You are The Empress
Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.
The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.
The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.
Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.
The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.
The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.
theEnd;DD
4/03/2007 10:54:00 PM
lalalas.
in sch comp lab now. hmmm.. GQ not online.
so i cant tok to him. erm. no. he's online now. hahas.
go disturb him. hahas.
jus now went to tlt's blog den i saw the taro card thingy.
erm. went to take the test. got the results which is the empress.
hahas. den got 1 paragraph of words. explaining to me?
hmm. btw i dun understand
watever.
kind of fed-up wib those sec5s in our sch.
so big liao still dunno how to pai dui. onli noe how to cut.
pls lah. damn. we always ended up not eating.
hahas. dun care bah. save money.
hahas.
hmmm. im bored now.
you noe. im reading tis book now. 'its called a breakup because its broken'
hmmm. very sad bah. read lots of breakup cases.
and wat most is. they want us to forget bout the past and carry on our life.
den i like made alot ppl wanna read tis book lei. yih rue;tempestt;sherr.
hahas.
one thing bout tis book its dat. it keep telling us cases. but not much like things the author wanna sae. hmmm
ytd tok to GQ. tok alot.
and wat he thinks dat im regetting now.
well. maybe i am now. im not sure bout tis.
hahas. but he saes dat its not a bad choice leaving him.
haiis. hmm.. breakup suckss..
hahas. tis reminds me smth. ytd i told GQ he suckss. hahas
cos he fooled me. dam him. hahas.
ya. jus now chinese lesson. untill half suddenly i told tempestt smth.
guess wat i told her?
hahas. i told her i feel like crying now.
dunno why i just suddenly feel like crying.
reali dunno why.
nth was on my mind. mr tan oso didnt sae anything arh.
den i suddenly feel like crying.
wat happen to me?
now i listening to 阿沁 & 李玖哲 de 记得爱
i oso feel like crying.
wth.
wat happen to me seh. quick cut the tap. i dunwant to cry.
oh no. im not thinking bout anything lei. ohmygod.
*ididntcry*
hmmm.. after sch i need go cp.
return book. might be buying my water bottle. not sure. hahas.
i shall blog more when i got home bah.
so confused now~~~
theEnd;DD
4/02/2007 07:04:00 PM
hahas. back
enjoying my chicken now. hahas. but very hard to eat. need to use my fork dig and dig and dig. hahas. eat till very messy. but nice nicee.
hmm. jus now cook ma.
during the fnn workshop. very disgusted by the inner part of the chicken.
kelvin dat group got heart inside their chicken.
while ours onli got kidney in the chicken.
very disgusting. eeekkkss..
heres the pics. of the heart and the kidney.
very disgusting de wor..
be prepared.
the chicken's heart. eeee.
the inner part of the chicken. eee..
very disgusting hor? dun pukes worr.
hmmm. still got more photos coming up.
lalalals.
dat kenneth arh. i wanna complain.
he go shower
come back i said WB. den he like not happy.
keep calling me go study.
sae wat treat him good not good...
wth. he arh.
bad guy. bad Guy.
heres the chicken outcome.
hahas. ABL is in our group cos her frens all ps her. so she joined us. hahas.
each group onli entitled to 1 chicken. dat means we sshould hab 2 halfs of the chicken.
but due to ABL's voluantary. we got a chicken extra.
cool right. dat mean we hab half of the chicken each.
its alot nor. so i shared wib my brother. hahas.
hmmm. wat else. ABL keep saying queenie. cos queenie wanna go up de ma.
den she snatch away the chance. haha. she bad hor she. hahas
enough talking le. bye.
theEnd;DD
4/02/2007 02:10:00 AM